Skip to main content

Following Phoenix - Stories of an Autistic Boy

This is not a topic I write about very often, but with some of the realizations I've had lately about how my oldest son's brain works, I feel the need to share some of our experiences with autism so that maybe I can help other parents that are struggling as we have been.

I've known for a few years now that there is something a little different about Phoenix, and it's not different in a bad way, just a different normal that we have to learn how to live with.

It started a few years ago when we noticed that loud noises bothered him and he had a strange speech issue where he starts his sentences over and over until it comes out exactly how he envisions it. Recently, we've noticed how he has a hard time with change and the newest development is his need for logic.If he doesn't understand the logic in something, he has a breakdown.

My husband and I made the decision a few years ago to homeschool him. Mostly because the schools in our area were terrible and we both worked many miles away from home which made picking up and dropping off impossible. It wasn't until this year, Phoenix actually started public school and the issues of autism really started to become real.

Although there are many stories about Phoenix's issues with starting school I can share, the one I am going to tell you today is the most recent event and it has to do with Halloween.

When logic takes control...
About a month ago I took the boys to the goodwill to look for their Halloween costumes. It was almost right away that Phoenix's eye was drawn to the Spiderman costume, his favorite super hero. The costume was a great price and it fit the boy like a glove so we bought it.

 Everything was great. Phoenix was super excited and talked about his costume all the time. He couldn't wait to wear it on Halloween.

This year with the holiday falling on a Saturday, the shops in downtown Oregon City decided to do their trick or treating on Friday night. This was the change that set off the whole downward spiral.

Phoenix couldn't go trick or treat on Friday, it wasn't Halloween. It didn't make any sense.

It didn't matter that he got an extra night of festivities which meant more candy and late nights, or the fact that he go to wear his costume twice. In fact, the whole thing made him ask why he had to wear a costume in the first place.

We told him that you wear a costume to make people happy so they give you candy. The boy flat out told me, "Why should I dress up for other peoples amusement?" And that was that. He wouldn't do it.

There was no extra trick or treating and no costume for Phoenix and that was ok with him.

With a little bit of coaxing, I was able to convince Pheonix to wear a sweatshirt that looked like a fireman jacket so at least he would fit in a little, but he still had a hard time with it.

Looking back now, I wonder if he would have reacted the same way if we hadn't introduced change into the routine that we had been talking about for almost a month, or if we would have had the same outcome with the costume anyway.

With every event we have, I learn a little more about how the boy's brain works. There is so much going on that I will never learn it all, but if I can help him just a little to cope with the amazing struggles that he has to deal with virtually on his own, then I know I have tried my hardest. Still, I feel like I'm always following Phoenix when I need to be walking beside him, and that's the most frustrating thing of all.


Popular posts from this blog

The Fight Continues | Theater of Spies by S.M. Stirling

Title: Theater of Spies By: S.M. Stirling Genre: Historical Thriller Pages: 400 Release Date: May 7th, 2019 Publisher: Ace
Summary from Goodreads: The second novel in an alternate history series where Teddy Roosevelt is president once more right before WWI breaks out, and on his side is the Black Chamber, a secret spy network watching America's back.
After foiling a German plot to devastate America's coastal cities from Boston to Galveston, crack Black Chamber agent Luz O'Malley and budding technical genius Ciara Whelan go to California to recuperate. But their well-deserved rest is cut short by the discovery of a diabolical new weapon that could give the German Imperial Navy command of the North Sea. 

Luz and Ciara must go deep undercover and travel across a world at war, and live under false identities in Berlin itself to ferret out the project's secrets. Close on their trail is the dangerous German agent codenamed Imperial Sword, who is determined to get his revenge, and a …

The Girl With All the Gifts | Movie Review

Title: The Girl with all the Gifts
Genre: Dystopian

Release Date: January 26th, 2017 Rating: 6.7/10 IMDB Cast: Sennia Nanua, Gemma Arterton
Summary from IMDB: A scientist and a teacher living in a dystopian future embark on a journey of survival with a special young girl named Melanie.
IMDB Trailer
Review: If this isn't fantastic or what? I loved the book and I'm always a little leary about watching the movie after I loved the book, but this one was worth the watch. 
I loved the dystopian zombie world. A bacteria has taken over the minds of those who are infected and they crave human flesh, but the children born with this disease arm mostly alive. They can learn and love, just like any normal child. The only difference is, they still crave flesh.
There are so many twists and turns in the story. It kept me on the edge of my seat. It wasn't really scary like a lot of zombie movies so if you are not a big fan of horror I think you would be safe with the semi freaky movie.
5 out of 5…

What I'm Reading This Week | #WeeklyMenu Week #255

Its Monday again. Always Monday. We go through the week and them come back to Monday. They day that I have to myself, or wished I had to myself. Really I share it with everyone. Never time to myself. Never a quiet moment away from people. It makes it hard, since I need my quiet time to rewind and reset for the week. I don't get that. All I get is angry. How am I supposed to feel better if I can't have my quiet time?

On the other side of things, I finally sat down to write. It was a nice day. The sun was shining, there was a cool breeze and an open pick-nick table on my lunch break. Perfect weather for a mid day writing session. Got a lot done on my new manuscript. I'm hoping this one will land me an agent, but we shall see.

Guess what I' reading this week? Ok, you probably already know because of the picture. Exit West. It serves two purposes for me. Its on my shortest books I wanted to read list and also takes care of one of my bingo spots, a book about today's is…