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Would you read this novel?

Its 8 o'clock on a Saturday morning. The kids are still asleep, husband is off to work, and the littlest monster in my tummy hasn't started kicking me yet.
I don't have many moments like this where the only sound is of my fingers flying across my keyboard, oh, and the ever vigilant munching of our fat cat Sysco. (Why don't you go catch a mouse or something?)
So I've decided to take this rare opportunity to do a much needed re write on my query letter for my first novel.
The first one was ok. After reading it over and over myself, ive found that it was confusing and hard to pick out the story line. Figures, its hard for me to get the jumbled thoughts in my brain out on paper correctly.
So, i've decided to post it to see if its a little less confusing, and as always, find out if this would be something that the everyday consumer would want to read.
Don't worry about hurting my feelings, I have a hard shell. :)
Thanks for your input!






Query letter for my novel "The legacy of ice and fire"


In a world where women are treated no better than a bartering chip, tabor must choose between marrying a blood thirsty warlord to save the monastery, the only home she's ever known, or run away with a stranger to save herself. This is one of the dilemmas Tabor must face in my novel, The Legacy of ice and fire.
Hours before Tabor is to marry, she finds out the life that she has been living is not the one she was born into. Events are set into motion quickly, leaving Tabor overwhelmed and confused. The man that she considered a father figure convinces her to marry another man, a stranger, and flee the only life she can remember.         
While being pursued through dangerous, unforgiving mountains by her ex fiancé, Tabor comes to find that she is part of a long forgotten race of people who disappeared hundreds of years ago. The only way to save herself and her new husband is to find them, but where does she look?
The road is long and cold, but Tabor has no choice but to press on, even when her feeble new world comes crashing down on her when her new husband betrays her. Can she hold her marriage together long enough to find her true home? Or will she run and hide, only to die alone in the snow at the hands of her ex?

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