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Trying to write again...


If there was one thing in the whole world I could do for the rest of my life, it would be writing. It has been a part of my life since I was about eight or nine and I wrote a story about a guy named Zartan and he grew backwards. He started old and grew younger, funny how the curious case of Benjamin Button has the same premise. I could have been rich... Sigh.

Over the last couple of years I've been working on a few projects, but I never completed them. I guess I just got board since none of them really had a plot any way.

So this time around i'm trying to do things right. I've been working on my plot every chance I get, building the characters and even writing a preface which I will post at the end of this blog. I want to finish this one and have it published.

Through my research of some of my favorite and very popular stories (twilight), I've come to realize that they don't really catch your attention as best as I would have thought for such wonderful books. I guess I just got caught up in all the hoopla surrounding the whole thing. I'm a sucker for a hot lead male character and a weird romance...

As I was saying, The first sentence needs to capture the reader and make them want to continue to read. This is why I changed my first sentence from "I love to write," to what it is now. Although I don't feel its as capturing as it could be.

Stephenie Meyer has the eye for the dramatic but her first sentences kinda suck.

Twilight's first sentence~
   My mother drove me to the airport with the windows down.

The author really didn't give us much of a hook on this one, in fact it took her the entire paragraph to explain to us how hot it is in Phoenix, Arizona. This information is important for us to know how different Forks is from Phoenix, but I'm not feeling it as a first sentence.

New Moon's first sentence~
   I was ninety-nine point nine percent sure I was dreaming.

I have to say that this one is a lot better then the last one. The author offers us something familiar, a lot of people say 99.9% sure. I do all the time, so we can relate. Plus the character is dreaming and those are always interesting. I'm inclined to read on. Bravo!

Eclipse's first sentence~
   I ran my fingers across the page, feeling the dents where he had pressed the pen to the paper so hard that it had nearly broke through.

All I feel from this sentence is that the main character is really obsessed about someone. Its kinda creepy, but then again, its better than twilight's opening sentence.

Breaking Dawn's first sentence~
   No one is staring at you, I promised myself. No one is staring at you, no one is staring at you.

.... Umm....I guess no body is staring at her. The one thing I procured from this sentence, no mater how vague it is, was how insecure the character is. I guess there is something to say for that. But when I read this I was like, "Really Stephenie, really?" I guess she didn't have to hook her readers at this point since they were already obsessed with the three previous books. To each there own.

On that note, here is my preface since I can't think of a good opening hook to keep you reading.



Preface

I had been strong so far, not a tear this entire journey. But this… This was too much. The man I loved was gone, vanished in the night like the thief that he was, and he took my heart with him.

My breathing was shallow as I stared across the blood stained snowy ground, at the man who came to kill me. It hurt to move, my rib must be broken. He broke it.

I pulled myself to my feet holding my side, my face contorting from the pain. If I was going to die, this would be how I wanted to go. On my feet, head held high, a free woman. He had taken everything from me, but not this, not my defiance. I would hang on to it till my last breath.

Already bloody from the battle, my would be murderer glared at me with a sick smile as he sauntered forward to kill me.

I want to say this in closing, before I show you some adorable pictures of my boys. 

I know my preface is short, but then again so is the one from Twilight. Mine is in fact 157 words long, which the one from Twilight is only 146. Take that Stephenie Meyer!

Here is cuteness:
How cute is this. Ronan and daddy.

Baby boy being cute, as always.
The awesome wreath I made my mommy!
Stuffing stuffed mushrooms

I swear I woke up this morning and it was this long.

Jason helping me test out our crappy chalk board for a photo shoot


Comments

  1. The Preface is quite the attention grabber, chilling and well written... I WANT MORE...

    ReplyDelete

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